Repairs

Day 35, Aug 3, Salida, CO.

My ride today was back on the Elliptigo rather than riding the road bike on a trainer like the last couple of days. I was testing out the recent repair work. I had the tires, brake pads, chain, and load wheels on the Elliptigo replaced yesterday. Including my pre-crossing training, the components all had about 2200 miles on them with that same amount estimated to go.

The trailer needed some maintenance/repair work and what we can do, such as cabinet latch repair, has been done to the extent we are able. Duct tape has temporarily solved a lost hose cap.

The truck needs some minor parts replaced, but they have not yet arrived to the dealership here even though they were ordered 6 weeks ago. We will likely have to wait until early Oct upon our return.

We came home to a non-functioning garage door, and that is scheduled to be looked at in a couple of days.

There were a few videoing camera glitches that need attention, but I haven’t gotten to them yet.

And I am in a of repair time myself, physically, mentally, emotionally.

Long ago I thought it was only things that wear out, that people have agency, can be disciplined, can persevere, can choose not to break. People shouldn’t. That isn’t true, people wear out too. We need maintenance, repair, rest and recovery time too. I was later than most to that understanding. Now I embrace it.

I am symbolizing the process of recovery with this journey and contend that regardless of the difficulties at times, the recovery journey is harder. And yet here I am with the freedom and opportunity to take several days off from my crossing, while those in recovery do not get a day off. They must remain vigilant every day. They have to repair the Elliptigo, trailer, house, and camera all while continuing their crossing. Is there a place where you, like I did and can still do, hold others to an “unbreakable” standard? Is there an area of your life that you hold yourself to that standard?

Addiction is a brain disease.

It disables decision-making.

It is treatable.

InJoelSteps.com

The Divide

Day 31, July 30, Salida, Rest Day.

We got to Salida (hometown) yesterday after the final big hurdle, the Rockies Continental Divide at Monarch. That means about 1400 miles traveled and 80,000’ climbed on the Elliptigo. The whole month prior to the start I totally detrained. Unintended, but necessary for other priorities. So I got to the start at San Francisco’s Golden Gate Bridge not only injured, but feeling weak, scared, and unconfident. It allowed me to consider how someone fighting SUD enters their battle. They often will feel scared, unconfident, and weak. One of my “mottos” for the project start was, “Get strong as you go along”. In other words, take the hard first step, then keep moving each day, day by day, and you will get stronger as you go. It gets easier as you move forward partly because you get stronger, and because the first step is the hardest due to inertia (fear, uncertainty), and subsequent ones are aided by your momentum. Remembering that will happen can work backwards to make the first step easier too!

Yesterday I got to stand at the Divide, a space where before and after meet. The work before acknowledged and appreciated, the work ahead respected, but with fear diminished. Get strong as you go along: true traveling cross-country, in recovery, in life.

Addiction is a treatable brain disease that disables decision-making. In joelsteps.com

Alright

Day 29, July 28, Sargent, CO.

5 mile road closure on 50 with very limited passthrough east on Montrose until 2022. Started after closure and went through Gunnison to Sargent near base of Monarch. Strava issue again, unknown what is up. Just a big climb and bigger descent tomorrow takes us back to Salida. Camping in Gunnison.

At each campsite, I have had the opportunity to share what we are doing. I’m usually asked about the Elliptigo or the Airstream Basecamp. A few nights ago our neighbor inquired and I shared about our cause and the loss of our third son Joel to OUD. He was in his 70’s and expressed condolences, then said that he had three sons and fortunately they all turned out “alright”. He said this without any self-awareness or malice and I took it as it was intended, his thankfulness for their well-being. But his is exactly the unconscious and unspoken attitude I wish to address. His statement implies that someone struggling with substances is not “alright”, that there is a character or moral flaw in the person or else they would not be in the position they are in. Had I said that we lost our son to brain cancer and we were crossing the U.S. to raise awareness and funds for research and treatment for that illness, he would not have said that thankfully, his three sons “turned out alright”. These individual attitudes make up corporately the attitudinal waters we swim in. That affects treatment options and availability, insurance funding, openness to seek treatment, support of family and friends, the approach of the criminal justice system, employment, and housing availability as a partial list. Someone who struggles with substances is “alright” as a person, but is sick, and like someone with other brain illnesses, needs help.

Addiction is a treatable brain disease that disables decision-making. Injoelsteps.com